Welcoming Change

The space in between…what a wonderful concept and another inspiring blog post from this thought provoking new blogger. Her willingness to take that leap in the dark not once but twice is an example to us all to push out of our comfort zones.

Abra K Deborah

Beginnings are scary.

I am writing this blog on the first day of the summer solstice, here in the Northern hemisphere. It seems fitting, as today I am writing about change.

Steven Rogers said, ‘Beginningsare usuallyscary,endingsare usuallysad, but it’s what’s in the middle that counts.’ I am embarking on a change in my career and it is scary. I have been here before, when I moved from the clear career path as an executive manager in the NHS to a very different role working for the Audit Commission, a national regulator of local authority and health care services. Then, as now, I moved from the safety of a role where I was respected and knew what I was doing, to one where I felt like the new girl – clueless and deskilled.

In recent years, I have been letting my profile as a consultant in health and social care…

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Balancing Time

Balancing our lives in the modern world is such a challenge but Deborah shows that with a little thought it can be done. Interesting post.

Abra K Deborah

Balancing commitments

‘I would find it hard shutting the door on my husband and children, saying I needed time to write,’ a woman once said to me, when I was giving a library reading. She longed to be a writer but didn’t honour herself by protecting her writing time.

This is so often a problem for woman, and I suspect men, as many are homemakers and care givers. When we take time for ourselves, we may feel guilty and sometimes use this as an excuse not to follow our dreams.

When our daughter was born thirty years ago, my husband gave up work to be a full-time dad. He never went back to work, through choice, and I have been the sole wage earner for our little family. It worked for us and I have no regrets. However, when I was working I felt I should be with my daughter…

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Meditation Challenge part one

Interesting blog on meditation with useful tips. Enjoy!

Abra K Deborah

Accepting the Meditation Challenge

I’m writing this blog, as I look back on a year when I committed to a daily meditation practice. Too weak-willed to give up chocolate or alcohol for Lent, I decided to do something worthy – to meditate every day for forty days. Forty days turned in to 400. I’m writing this on Easter Sunday, one year on from when my challenge was due to end, and I have no intention of giving up now.I wanted to share with you my journey, partly for myself –to capture my learning before I forget, but also in the hope that it may help you, whether you, like me, are a writer, or just interested in developing a regular meditation practice.

Last year we had not experienced Covid 19. The devastation of that pandemic on so many lives certainly puts my past worries into perspective. However, I am using…

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No one to talk to

Pressure is a funny thing. Some people thrive under pressure, others crumble. Pressure can concentrate minds to get a task done – hands up who used to do their homework on the eve of going back to school – yep, me too! I needed that pressure of a deadline to finally knuckle down and get the work done. Friends of mine planned their time and got all their homework done on the first couple of days of the holiday. No sick feeling in the pits of their stomachs as the end of the school holidays approached but they also did not get to enjoy the first few days of the holiday like I did.

Diamonds are formed under pressure but too much pressure can crush the life out of anything.

Stress is a different beast to pressure. However much we may want to limit the stress in our lives it will always be there. How we handle it is the key. Overreaction to anything is never good. Trying to keep things in perspective is the best approach but also the hardest.

We are more interconnected thanks to the internet and social media than we have ever been before and yet loneliness is on the rise. Thousands of likes and followers is a nice thing to have but when the walls are closing in at three in the morning your social media status can be of cold comfort.

adult alone black and white dark
Photo by Kat Jayne on Pexels.com

When the pressure of modern life gets too much we all need someone to talk to: a spouse, a friend, a relative. A go to person. Oftentimes, it can, however, be hard to talk to the people closest to us. Sometimes a friend or acquaintance will be better able to assist because they have the advantage of distance. Someone closer may be invested in the situation and whether consciously or unconsciously their bias may end up colouring their advice.

Chances are you will go to different people at different times of your life. Most of us probably will. Most of us.

It’s the people who suffer in silence that are more at risk. It’s the people who are copers. The people other people turn to. The people who think that to admit they need help is somehow a sign of weakness and so they soldier on until the burden becomes intolerable and the only way out is to do the unthinkable.

A friend of a colleague committed suicide this week. He was in his thirties, a family man, in good health with his own business. Those around him are crushed by grief and weighed down by questions that can never now be answered.

Shaking their heads in bewilderment they say ‘But he had so much to live for’. ‘How could this have happened?’ ‘He didn’t seem the type.’

High achieving, perfectionist, type A personalities cannot do everything by themselves. No one can. And it’s to life’s copers this post is aimed. Gold star for being a coper most of the time but no one expects you to cope ALL of the time. Reaching out to someone else for support when the going gets tough is natural, its HUMAN. I am quite happy to champion individualism but we are pack animals at the end of the day. We need each other.

man s hand in shallow focus and grayscale photography
Photo by lalesh aldarwish on Pexels.com

There is an old adage: ‘A problem shared is a problem halved’.

Don’t suffer in silence.